I wasn't punched + Being bold and different

The lower lid of my right eye has been swollen since yesterday. As I have dark circles under the eyes, I actually look like a victim of violent domestic abuse now. A few people commented it looked as though I'd been punched.

Thanks for all your concern! Don't worry, I wasn't punched. I'll visit my family doctor first thing tomorrow morning (he's closed on Sundays).

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I was at a Romance and Relationship Conference yesterday. At the end of the conference, Pastor had a Q&A session with us. The guy sitting next to me decided to go first. His Qs went something like this:

Q1: You have mentioned earlier about the ability for restraints (yes, no sex before marriage). So how does a dating couple know where to draw the line, especially if both of them are getting really intimate?

Q2: You have mentioned in your sermons that a man thinks about sex 7 times a day. I am currently in my twenties and is single. Do you have any suggestion/advise on how do I overcome the sex thoughts?

If you're feeling shocked after reading them, yes you are normal. About 98% of the audience were looking at him as if he's weird (especially after the 2nd Q).

I spent a great deal of time with someone like that before. Someone who holds no punches with his words. A non-conformist as my friend put it. He's not purposefully being different. He's just like that. People were often offended by his remarks, but he never explains or apologizes for being candid.

I felt that guy sitting next to me had done a good thing - he'd open the floodgates for the many embarrassing and difficult Qs that soon followed. If he didn't, there's probably:

(a) a delay. It's always difficult to be first in a Q&A.
(b) a lot of important Qs won't be asked. There is nothing more bold than admitting you're thinking about sex 7 times a day.

Pastor's answer to those Qs was just as open and candid - get attached and marry ASAP.

To the guy sitting next to me, thank you for being bold and different.

Korean singing in English

This has been on Youtube for a while. I had a totally LMAO time watching this.

Keeping the WOWs in your VOWs

I noticed there is an increased emphasis about keeping love relationships together. There are more people attending church as well. Everyone’s looking for love and affirmation when the economy is rejecting people. On the bus and MRT, over radio, on TV, at Borders and Kinokuniya. Books, workshops, activities, seminars, and marriage counseling, etc.

Money is the top divorce reason for today, followed by infidelity and change in priorities. My guess is in a time of economic crisis, money issue is going to drive couples apart much quickly.

We all take things for granted. There’s no such thing as a convenient relationship. The deeper the intimacy, the harder both parties need to work together to keep the love alive. This is not a relationship maintained over a cup of coffee once a month for 2 hours each time.

Sharing daily affairs, activities and responsibilities requires a great deal of commitment and communication. Crisis, burdens and uncertainties will only put additional stress on a marriage that is already on shaky grounds.

Pastor Kong began a series on Difference between Men and Women (the pointers are taken from the book His needs, Her needs). I guess it is to educate couples against the wrath of the crisis, burdens and uncertainties in this bleak economic weather.

I guess only when basic needs are met, can love withstand the test of difficult times?

Sugar Grams

We did Sugar Grams on Friday during cell group. It's a small exercise whereby everyone write something good and encouraging about everyone. So each of us had a piece of paper on the back and we started writing.

This is my list. Some of the feedback surprised me.

1) Sociable and warm-hearted
2) Kind, good listener
3) Personable, good at building relationships
4) Friendly and passionate
5) Good at lifting up the atmosphere and cheerful
6) Flair in writing, captivating
7) Friendly and kind
8) Ever-ready and willing
9) Gentle and very kind to people
10) Friendly and creative, kind
11) Kind to animals

These are feedback from my cell group members. I wonder if my colleagues think the same way?

Why lizards?

It's been a while since I last blogged and the first thing I want to talk about is lizard.

I came home late last night from a cell group meeting. Everyone’s asleep. I checked some emails and got ready for a nice relaxing shower.

The moment I closed the bathroom door, I noticed two lizards trying to take a bath as well. They quickly scrambled for the nearest corner, as if getting their stuffs ready for a nice relaxing shower too.

Lizards are at the top of my Most Hated List. To me, they are worse than flying cockroaches. I simply can’t stand the sight of these dirty, scaly, dull-green colored, translucent, tail forsaking reptiles.

Needless to say, it only took me five minutes to get out of the bathroom. All tensed.

I don’t feel relaxed or cleaned!